dualisnet | PSA From your Friendly UN: GarbageMan

it was a better thought than thinking it was a bag of trophies right?

what answer were you expecting? i think they'd make neat jewelry. or i could add them to my jacket with the heads!

That's pretty much what I'm thinking it is, yeah.

Weapons or even more gross trop

Jacket with heads?

well you go to the worst case scenario fast!

i dont think teeth would be good weapons. and i can be a weapon on my own.

yes! dolls heads mostly

Comes with the territory.

Depends on the teeth. Human teeth? Probably not. Then again you never know.

That's. Weird.

I'll give you a shout next time I find a bag full of doll heads.

what territory is that?

i get that a lot.

really?! please do! i need to replace some

Mercenary. You're expected to prepare for the worst case scenario.

Can't say that's too surprising.

Will do. Shame to say I tossed the last one. Didn't have much use for them.

oh that must be a very exciting job

oh. that is very disappointing. i could have replaced one that has paint coming off

It was. Now I pick up trash. Considerably less exciting.

I find weird shit every day I'm sure another one will come through.

but you found teeth and can make up great stories for it. at least i could. creative ones!

whats the weirdest thing youve found?

You better believe in a couple weeks this story's gonna be way more interesting.

Let's see... the doll heads. Lotta mannequin parts. Teeth I think tops the list so far. Although there was a blanket full of weird... stick figure things tied together with hair or something that was pretty fuckin' weird. My partner at the time really freaked out over it.

Dunno what the hell his problem was.

what will the story be?

oh! the blanket does sound weird. Like a ritual or something maybe. maybe you have cult people here! and the teeth went to some of them too

Can't tell you that, it'll ruin the surprise. Besides I need time to come up with it.

Maybe? I wouldn't know. Never seen anything like it. Kinda gave me the creeps, and that's sayin' something.

i like surprises! but i could come up with one faster

are you used to creepy? or do you consider yourself creepy?

Alright if you're so good at it you tell me what story you'd come up with.

I don't think I'm creepy? Just ain't much that phases me.

you could see through the bag of teeth that they were charred. a bag of teeth is unusual. a bag of teeth that had been partially burnt is weirder. so you opened the bag and took the teeth out to examine. the little voice in your head told you maybe this was best for the police but you ignored it. you wanted to make sure that it wasn't something that could hurt anyone! after all you have to help keep this place safe right? we're all in it together! when you looked at the teeth you could see that there were strange scratches on them. symbols maybe? bits of it were burnt off nobody could read it anyway. one tooth had something metal in it. maybe a filling or something like that? you're not familiar with teeth stuff anyway.

you asked a coworker to look at it and he laughed and opened his mouth to show a tooth that has a very similar looking piece of metal in it. after a closer inspection your coworker says that it even looks like the same tooth. weird.

a few days passed and you asked around about if people knew anything. nobody seems to or at least they really dont want to talk about it. but now your own teeth are starting to hurt. they feel itchy. so you're asking all of us if we have seen any weird symbols or had any weird feelings in our teeth!

i think i could do better than that...but an attempt was made

Holy shit.

You've got a knack for this. I think I like your story better than anything I could come up with.

You gotta come up with an end for this!

do you want a good ending or a bad ending?

Can I pick both?

that's two endings so you would never know which is the real one

Alright I'm a sucker for a happy ending.

those are always the harder ones to make up

i guess for a happy ending you'll have to find that there's a cult. they've been cursing people here. its very terrible and you find a few bodies before their teeth are taken. they have tiny marks on the teeth just like the ones in the bag but not as far yet.

you work hard determined to solve the case and stop the curses and bad things that were happening to people here. you track them down by yourself and confront them. its a big fight but you manage to subdue the bad guys and save the man that they were going to make their newest sacrifice

now you're hailed as a hero because you stopped the bad people and saved the man! and he owns a strawberry business and as a reward he's given you a lifetime of free strawberries!

yay you for being a hero!

They're the harder ones to achieve, too.

Hah! I like this one. Not only do I get to be a hero I get free strawberries. Who can complain about that?

You have to be the hero since you started it all! So you have to be the hero of the story

I bet you're a hero for real

Is that how that works?

Hah. If only.

[Quite the contrary unfortunately.]

of course!

well if you're not the hero then you can be the hero now!

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