dualisnet | UN: Almasy

Mmhmm. I'm sure that's what it is. [Rinoa's calling his bluff and poking a little fun at him. When things get too serious, then they get a little awkward. As... they've both witnessed multiple times now. Of course, there are likely some serious hurdles they need to climb over together, and Rinoa suspects that he's not in a hurry to do so.

...She probably isn't either.

She's in the process of nodding and certainly with the mind to make him some cocoa when his followed words grant her pause. She pauses back in his doorway and simply stares at him.]

It's not just one of you, it's both of you? [She pinches the bridge of her nose and shakes her head slowly.] What am I going to do about you guys? I always have to be the mom. In that case, I guess that means I have some choice words for him, too. If you guys are gonna do something dangerous, would it kill you to tell me? Otherwise, I find out in ways that...

[In ways that she worries. One day she might not be able to help either of them. That's a frightening thought.]

Look. I just... I don't want to lose you guys. That's why I ask to be included. What if something happened and no one told me anything, What am I supposed to do? So next time, Seifer. [She straightens up and gestures to him.] At least send me a text that says you're getting in trouble, so I know what to expect.

[...Doesn't seem she has any plans to be running off anywhere. She's here first, after all. Squall probably knows what's coming to him anyway.]

[It's his story and he's sticking to it. She's not wrong he just won't admit it. Otherwise things will definitely get awkward and neither of them want that.

He's not going to be the one who volunteers the hurdle this time. Just quietly resentful without explanation. Because he's an asshole that can't trust or appreciate nice things.

Exactly why he sabotaged a perfectly enjoyable conversation! Her words earn a slight wince, with him averting his gaze to the wall and setting his jaw. It's not her job to baby them they're fine.]

Ain't my fault he forgot how to train. Nothin' dangerous about it.

[Normally. It was supposed to be routine.

Although he has to admit he's surprised she's not rushing off to tend to Squall. A sentiment reflected in the confused look he shoots her.]

That's how you wanna play it, huh?

[She looks unimpressed and doesn't bother to disguise it.] It's fine if you don't care, but I do. Maybe you and Squall want to be the ones acting nonchalant like it doesn't matter, but your lives don't just impact you. [Or her.]

[Rinoa has half a mind to continue because nagging is what she's best at, but... If he doesn't want to hear it, then he'll choose not to hear it. No different from Squall in that respect. How could those two ever have been at odds when they're so alike? For some moments, she looks... disappointed. And a little hurt. But she decides not to say anything more.

And disappears just long enough to make them both some cocoa, because now she needs some too. Seems like the only solace she'll be getting comes from a cup. Somehow, she is less than surprised.]

[That earns a scowl in return. Training is what they do, of course it isn't serious to them. Not being able to hold up in training is serious, means choking in a real battle and that's when you die. Doesn't she realize that?

It's what they're for. She knew that going in

She leaves before he can snap back, probably a good idea before he goes burning bridges as he's ever so good at doing.

Instead he just sulks. Chewing sourly on her words. What does she know? Squall's the only one whose life matters out of them anyway. That's how it's always been.

Something the most similar people are the ones most at odds with each other.

By the time she's returned he's fallen into a brooding silence. Tucked himself into the furthest corner on his bed and settled on scowling at the wall across from him.]

[She's seen that look before. On him. On Squall. On her own father's face. Seems like an unfortunate common happenstance, doesn't it? She eyes him for some moments, cycling through the variety of things she could say, some she probably shouldn't, some he should probably hear whether he wants to or not. You just don't want me to be right, she thinks momentarily before she pieces herself back together.

Rinoa settles down their cups on the table nearest them and maybe she should just hand his to him first. But she is... still herself at the end of the day and just crawls into bed with him. Doesn't even ask. Just does it because what are personal boundaries. Only when she's settled does she offer his cup over to him. Little does he know that the moment he takes it, she intends to just cosy right on up against him.

Misery loves company, or something like it.]

Sorry. [She begins thoughtfully.] You guys are the combatants. I'm not. I shouldn't be getting involved in it. Yeah, it'd be nice for you guys to be more careful, but it is what it is. [Maybe not knowing about it is just something she has to expect. To some degree, because she won't always be able to get them out of a jam, she has to trust them to handle themselves on occasion. Without her meddlesome interference.]

[Maybe it comes with the territory of military personnel. Being unwilling or unable to talk about... Really anything. There was a lot he could say, none of which would improve their situation right now.

Burning bridges is the only way he can at least feel like he had some control over the inevitable loss. She'll abandon him like everyone else. Like she already has before.

Which only makes it more surprising that she's sticking around. Shoving herself right up into his space. He doesn't think he deserves to take any comfort in it, even though he is. Just a little. Very cautiously.

It's nice. Feeling wanted once in a while.]

It's just training.

[Of course he's going to keep protesting that it's no big deal.]

If we were going anywhere actually dangerous we'd tell you.

[They're big boys. It's what they're made to do. Fight wars, forever, until they die. What else is there for them?]

Just training. [She raises an eyebrow, not wholly convinced, but... She's beaten that into the ground at this point, hasn't she? Settling in with her cocoa right against him, she realises that it's been... one of the few times so far in the city that she's felt even remotely comfortable. If they weren't in a completely foreign place, she'd almost feel right at home.

The company helps, whether he's aware of it or not. It's been hard to integrate herself. It shouldn't be. She's talkative and friendly, but now that she has all of this time to contemplate the past and figure out what to do with her present and her future, it's a complicated mess. She almost likes it better when things were constantly on the go. This whole thinking thing is making her perceive things a little bit more closely. She can see so many things she's said and done that were... Well. Wrong.]

Hopefully you guys won't have to go anywhere dangerous. Hopefully none of us will. [She pauses after a moment and finds herself laughing quietly.] I already know that won't happen. I'm not going to get caught up in the unrealistic. So we'll just have to do the best we can with what we've got. We're all here together. [And it's nice to see him and Squall kind of, sort of getting along. Or supposedly, if what Squall told her is true.]

Your cocoa okay? It's not too hot, is it? I was gonna put little marshmallows in it, but I felt weird going through your stuff.

[This time it is the truth. Just training. Why Squall froze up and got himself clocked is a good question, not one Seifer has any current answers to. They'll have to deal with that another time.

It is comfortable, strangely so, a familiar comfort that feels lifetimes away. Maybe Squall will forgive him for stealing just this much.

If he knew her thoughts he'd agree on the one point, being on the go keeps one from thinking too much. Part of why he works himself until he can't stand anymore. It's the only way to keep himself out of his head.

Her comment earns a rueful huff. Seifer doesn't need to say it, she already knows that's impossible.]

Something's brewing. Better to prepare now for the worst.

[What it is he doesn't know but there's a tension in the air. This whole thing with the Head and the Heart is going to come to a head, taking them along with it.

She's right though. At least they had each other. They were getting along! Weirdly enough. Helped being outside Garden's expectations.

He shook his head, taking a sip. So far he'd been staring distantly into it.]

No, it's perfect. Dunno if we have any.

Yeah, you're right.

[Rinoa leans up against him as carefully as she can manage. The truth is that she's afraid. Of something happening to him. Of something happening to Squall. To Nida. To any of them. It's not even her she's thinking of. It's all of them. How many times has that happened? It's part of why recklessness gets so dangerous. Rinoa throws herself in not thinking about the consequences, only ever wanting to help. Because it's never herself she's thinking of.]

I'll make sure I'm prepared, too.

[Eventually she looks over to him and for several moments, she simply stares, as if by asking nothing she can receive all of the answers she's curious about. What is it that he thinks? How can he still be so much of a mystery to her? She should have known him better...

Can she call herself his friend?]

I'd get up and check, but I'm too comfortable, so I guess you'll just have to live without marshmallows. Next time, though.

[Which, on the subject of being prepared, he thinks it might be a good idea to figure out how to make her a new weapon. His and Squall's are well underway, Nida's are easy to construct. She needs something also. Because he knows her well enough to know she's absolutely going to jump into something reckless sooner or later. Better to give her the best chance she can have.]

Good. In the meantime, I'll see what I can do about arming you.

[They might have to fight. They should be ready.

He goes quiet then, just settling into his corner with Rinoa leaning against him, slowly sipping his cocoa. He feels her eyes on him, but stays silent for a time. Unsure of what to say or if he should mention it. Seifer's no better than Squall at volunteering information it would seem.]

It's alright.

[He's not that concerned about marshmallows.]

I can't read your mind y'know. You got somethin' to ask you gotta ask it.

[Arming her. Right, because she doesn't have a projectile. She didn't come to the city with much of anything except herself. She takes a moment to eye her arm, thinking it's strange that she's seen it bare for so long. She really does feel powerless. Rinoa isn't as much a combatant as the rest of them, but as long as they're together, she knows she has the courage to try.

She nods slowly and when her gaze finds his again, she's trying to bury her face into her cup. It doesn't fit, of course.

He gives voice to his own thoughts and just like that, she's colouring. It's normally so easy to be transparent with her heart right out in the open. Yet there remains an undeniable tension that she doesn't know how to work past. Seems like right now neither of them are particularly good with their words.]

O-oh, nono. It's okay. I was just admiring you. That's all.

[It's not really a lie either. But maybe it'll catch him off guard. She likes catching people off guard.]

[She does have a whole boatload of Sorceress magic, and her Knight, which should probably make her technically the more dangerous out of all of them. Potentially anyway. Not that Rinoa would hurt a fly or know how to, which kinda negated the whole super powerful Sorceress thing. Don't think he's forgotten, Seifer just tries not to think too hard on it lest he freak himself out.

As long as they stick together they'll figure it out.

He smirks to himself at her reaction, puffing up a little. Stroking his ego is the worst idea, Rinoa!]

Oh is that all? I am worth admiring you've got that right. [The smirk turns into a sly grin.] But I don't think that's what you were doing at all.

[Come on, Rinoa, out with it. She knows he's too persistent to give up that easy.]

[His reaction makes her laugh. She's not sure how she expected anything other than that. It's nice to see him be a little arrogant. Kind of makes her think of the Seifer she's used to seeing. That familiarity gives her a sense of security.

In those moments, she feels very safe and it's probably the first time she's felt that way since she's arrived. Although that's a little embarrassing to admit. Especially right now, of all moments.

Rinoa grins into her cup, using a moment or two to stall for a more proper response.]

Oh, yeah? Like you'd even know. I'm just full of surprises, Seifer. But I mean, if you wanna make a game out of it. I've got all the time in the world. But I'm gonna win. I don't like losing.

[Clearly it is time for strip poker.]

[Seifer's still in there. He's just not been doing that hot lately. It's a lot to adjust to, trying to figure out his place in the universe now that his only opportunity is completely fucked over. Where do you go when you've been thrown out so many times there's nowhere left for you?

Seeing her lighten up does help him relax some though. That familiar smile and laugh. It's nice to see her like this, with less weight holding them both down.]

Fine, if you don't want any answers. Ain't any skin off my nose.

[He offers flippantly, with a light shrug. Gentle, so as not to jostle her too much.]

[She softens then.

Nestling against him, she finds herself eyeing him once more.]

I was just wondering what you were thinking. Not that you have to share it or anything. I was thinking that... no matter how much I think I know you, I don't. I can only guess. I don't think any amount of time that we spent together would change that either. But that isn't a bad thing.

[Dipping her head, she rests chin to his shoulder thoughtfully.]

But if you feel like being talkative with me, by all means. I'm all ears.

What, right now? Wondering when this place is gonna turn on it's head and screw us.

[It's a rough explanation but it's not a lie. He worries about stuff like that a lot. Always trying to see what's ahead before they get there. Poking his nose where it doesn't belong. He'll continue doing that, too. Garden never appreciated it.]

You could guess, [He confirms.] Or you could ask. Beats the hell outta wondering doesn't it? Besides, I thought we agreed we've got time.

[This time it's not brief visits in between missions and leaves at Garden. Now they actually have all the time they want for that kind of thing. And Seifer's not quite as tight-lipped as Squall about everything. He just doesn't volunteer much to people he doesn't know well.]

Well, I didn't mean right now right now.

[Hyne, how does she even start talking about this kind of thing with him? Where do they begin? There's not a map that leads to these things, after all. Rinoa lifts a hand into her hair and shakes about her dark mane of hair.]

But yeah. I hear you. Anytime now, right? That's kind of why we have to be prepared.

[She finds her stare looking into her cup of cocoa, because it's a great deal easier looking at him, no matter how nice it is to be right there with him.]

I guess... I just don't really know what I'm doing. Here. With you. In general. Feels like everyone else always has a plan. I'm trying to have one. Acting like I do. Don't really, though. Just doing what I think feels right. I'm terrible at this. I'm supposed to be some great sorceress and I can't even hold a conversation. It sounds silly.

[She can't help but laugh.] And you've probably had your fill of heavy conversation. I should be leaving that to you and Squall. You guys were made for each other.

Oh.

[Well! She has to be more specific! How do conversations work? See, Rinoa evidently thinks that somehow Squall and Seifer have a method of actually talking to each other. They don't. They're very bad at it. Just like he is here with her.]

I'm getting there. Squall hasn't brought you down to the shop yet has he?

[Because he should have! What a rude Squall. Staring into the cocoa is safer, though Seifer finds himself watching her out of the corner of his eye instead. He huffs an amused, rueful sound through his nose.]

Wanna know a secret? None of us know what the fuck we're doing. There's no plan. We're just going off what seems like a good idea at the time. [Remember the sheer amount of stupid he gets himself into, Rin? This is why.] If it makes you feel any better I'm shit at this conversation thing too. Usually I let someone else talk.

[It's easier that way. And hey he doesn't even flinch about the Sorceress thing! Improvement.]

Hyne. No kidding. Everything's so... [He gestures vaguely.] With him.

[Though, wait, he does cast her a questioning look at that last bit. Clearly she didn't mean it to sound like that? Nah. But hey if she wants to complain about Squall he's all ears make him feel better where Squall's not mister perfect all the time.]

Uhm. No. Not yet. But he's talked about it. I know it exists. It's only a matter of time before I show up. Then none of you will ever be rid of me and you'll regret letting Squall show me where it's at.

[She pauses after a moment in thought, however. Squall said it's a place where they can go to be safe. Herself included. Because of course he wants her safe. They probably all do. In retrospect, Rinoa's rather fortunate. Three combatants who are more than willing to strike down anyone who comes up against her. Even in spite of her own abilities.

...Because she's incapable? Because Rinoa is still, ultimately a gentle creature at heart? Or because she's weak? She doesn't know.]

I guess it's silly to think any of us do. We're what, kids, right? Kids don't know anything. [Sounds like something her father would say and for a moment, she cringes. Yet Seifer distracts her and thank Hyne he does.

She raises an eyebrow.]

Everything's so... what with him? What are you really saying there? He said you guys were actually getting along. Was he just trying to keep me from scolding him or is that true?

I dunno, if you bring cocoa along with you I think that'll keep the complaints down to a minimum.

[Is he trying to wheedle more cocoa out of her? Absolutely he is. Also it's lonely out there sometimes. He likes being busy but he doesn't like being alone so much. And of course they want her safe. They want all of each other safe. And having a safe place, where they can all check in, helps ensure that. It also has nothing to do with thinking her weak or incapable, Seifer knows better, but he and Squall are also trained to be defensively minded. Her kindness and gentleness does have some to do with it though.

Seifer would hate for her to turn into one of them. Rinoa still has so much of herself in her, it'd be a crime for that to be erased.]

Kids. Tch. [He snorts, expression darkening.] Like any so called 'adults' in our lives knew a damn thing they were doing. Quick to toss us into the fires they're too fuckin' cowardly to do anything about. [The adults were useless.]

[He frowns at her, shaking his head quickly.] No it's not like that it's just...

Hell I don't know. Tense? [He's struggling for proper words for it, so he takes a sip of his cocoa to stall.] There's just a lot to sort through. I don't get him half the time.

[Just like he doesn't get her either. How can they both be so comfortable with him? How can they have forgiven him so easily?]

Cocoa, huh? Sounds like someone's partial. Or maybe it's just the person bringing the cocoa.

[She's teasing him. Really. She is. It's just a joke, though she... Well. Rinoa admits at least to herself that maybe she's a little curious over the truth in the statement. Truth is, they probably wouldn't care what she brought. Only that it's her at all. She could believe that.

It's as she mulling over the concept of kids and adults that she's reminded of a very similar conversation she's had with Squall. Not too long ago either. It seems like it's one more thing they have in common with one another. But neither he nor Seifer are particularly wrong. If adults could have handled things, could have fixed things, there wouldn't have been a need to create gardens to raise children up into mercenaries. It's almost cruel when she thinks about it. Sure, it'd be easy to pass it off as simply a means of 'that's the way the world works,' but that's irresponsible.

As such, she doesn't offer him any kind of counterargument, as much as she wishes she could. Squall is a surprisingly easier topic. Maybe. Or maybe he just doesn't disappoint her so much.]

Tense is a good word for him. I think... like you, he's just finally having this opportunity to discover himself. Both of you were just restrained to your roles for so long. You never had an opportunity to really live or to learn. And now you both have that chance.

[Too many years too late, perhaps.]

You both just need some time, you know? You're trying to make up for a lot of lost time. So don't force it. Just... let things fall as they will. If something breaks, we clean it up and do our best to put it back together. A crack doesn't make something ugly. It just makes it more beautiful.

[...She's such an odd duck.]

Maybe. I'll never tell.

[It might be both. It's probably both. The cocoa is nice, but she's right, she could bring anything and he'd be happy about it. Seifer's not picky. He's just... glad they're not enemies. Glad that she doesn't hate him as much as he thinks she should.

They grew up in the same situation after all. Being trained to cover up for the failings of those who should have taken more responsibility. Making it through those situations as much by chance as anything else, as those selfsame adults continued to fail them every step of the way. What use were they when they needed teenagers to save the world they had more than a decade's warning about the looming threat? This was the best they could do?

The world didn't work this way until so called adults decided to make it so.

They should just bicker about Squall, it's easier.]

[Her words earned a nod along with a thoughtful frown. She's not wrong. It's been hard on them both, trying to learn how to be "normal" people. Discovering a complete and utter lack of life skills was pretty shocking back in the village. Still a struggle here after Seifer had begun to hone a few into something useful. At least he can keep himself fed, that's something.]

[He huffs in amusement, shaking his head ruefully.]

I think a crack means it's broken and time to throw it out, Rin.

[It's said gently, maybe even sorrowfully. If buried under a significant amount of sarcastic tone to keep the edge off. There's something about it that implies he might not be talking about a thing so much.]

[They were robbed of so much. Could they ever truly learn how to function in the real world now?]

[Rinoa chooses not to tease him over his response. She is confident that she knows him well enough to conclude he does indeed, enjoy both aspects of cocoa.

Perhaps she could continue to wax poetically if she knew what was going on in his head. But she is blissfully unaware, and if not blissful, then simply unaware. He continues and the words he offers her aren't...

Well. They don't instil much confidence in her. Yet that's to be expected considering all both of them have been through. It doesn't really surprise her to hear such concepts out of him. And she knows very well what he means when he says it. It's not things he's talking about at all. It's him.

Rinoa eyes him for some moments and she leans over and presses the tip of her nose into his cheek.]

No. I refuse to believe that. I won't make you believe it, but I can't. We can only be complete when we're all together.

UN: Almasy - Audio

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