Hank Anderson (
sociallychallenged) wrote in
dualisnet2020-02-08 12:16 am
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[He's still fuckin' trying, though.]
[He positions the phone so it's showing an old-timeyish looking Detective's office. We're talking he went for the Sam Spade aesthetic. He plants himself in a desk seat.]
So, I know I just fuckin' talked about getting a promotion. But I had some things go wrong with my last case. [Some big things. People kept going missing, for one.] Connor got assaulted by a decorated officer. And while he's getting what's due uh... I don't know. I figured it'd be better if I got him out of there while he was recovering emotionally. And this fuckin' job would require less walking.
[Those are his excuses? Real reason number one? Connor can't understand all those extra languages at the moment. Real reason number two? Being in the middle of the police station when his year runs up doesn't sound like the best plan. And for some people? Seems like it's not taking a year.]
[He sure as shit would like to stop losing fucking friends. Thanks.]
[Hank turns himself in his chair.] This is my new private detective's office. So now I get to take pictures for paranoid fuckin' people looking for reasons for divorce. I'm really goddamn excited about that. [He smears his hand down his face, then scratches his beard.]
But uh. It was time I said good-bye to the job. [He'd always said this was his last chance to be a cop, and here it is. But damn if the heaviness of that loss isn't weighing on him too.]
no subject
There are a few other ways he can think of to deal with people who can't die, and that's supposing their immortality still works for them in the same way. They've established here many times that what works in one way in one world doesn't work that way here. Maybe the Head has his ways.
He distractedly strokes Hank's palm under his thumb as he analyses the signals from the implant, and they're strong now. It used to be fainter, vaguer, like some kind of odd interference was stopping him picking up the specifics. Now everything is clear and crisp, and with very little effort Connor can feel his own hand stroking Hank's palm as if it were his own palm too.
He wonders how much Hank can feel from him, too - if the background processes keeping his systems working, his sense of time running at the right rate, his temperature within a tenth of a degree of standard, if those are all tangible.
...If Hank can feel and understand the sensory data Connor's picking up from the environment around them. Ambient temperature, noises from outside that Hank himself can't hear, the little electrical frequencies of their phones and the bug Connor just pulled out of the vent in the bathroom, sitting harmlessly on the desk.
(He even for a second finds himself wondering if Hank could use Connor's processing power to think or react faster, in a crisis, say.)
There are so many possibilities to explore with something like this.
no subject
He lacks any statistical control, his mind unable to settle on particular numbers, but if Connor were to use his mind palace, he'd be able to see it.
He knows that Connor is feeling himself back, and Hank grumbles a soft 'sorry' for not being in better control of that.
There are little unique things Hank feels, too. The ache of old bones, like a discomfort in his knees due to his tendency to sit oddly in chairs. A permenant crick in his back. Things that might not translate precisely to an android mind, but still come through that feedback loop.
While he's calm, though, he doesn't otherwise interfere with any of Connor's systems. The contented mood is settling.
no subject
Then he tries something else, something he doesn't really expect to work but - he activates his mind palace, ramps up his processing speed so that time seems to slow to a stop. He has full awareness of the room, a monochromatic graphical interface laid over it, sensors picking brighter trails of their footprints, an even brighter sense of the bug on the table between them. The vague notion of a task list dancing on the edge of his vision that even Connor rarely pays attention to anymore. Their bodies can't move fast enough to keep up with this, only Connor's mind, and maybe, just maybe--
Hank?
--maybe Hank can see this, one of the most advanced things his mind is capable of. Maybe the most personal thing Connor can show him.
no subject
That's when he goes quiet and looks around. It's Connor's job to change focus, but yeah, when connected to him like this, he's suddenly very aware of the particulars of his surroundings.
It's his own sense of wonder kicking in, at the world devolving into Raw Data, separated into points of highlighted importance.
"Wow."
Oh that felt way too long to say. He needs to be quiet when he does this, because suddenly he's aware of his human limits at communicating.
no subject
He lets Hank look around, take control of Connor's focus to shift it where he wants. Though it might be strange if he focuses on himself. There's nothing visually different, not exactly. But there's a large amount of processing power dedicated to Hank that becomes especially clear in Connor's mind palace.
Impulses - to look at Hank, to touch him, to taste him, to hear his voice and hear his opinion on the things important to Connor. Awareness - a constant background awareness that Hank's there, close to him, and the comfort that brings him, the little occasional flickers of wanting more, wanting him closer. Emotion - Connor's feelings are cascades of programming that, with Hank, are in constant ebb and flow. In some moments it becomes so intense it takes up more space in his memory than it rightly should, little hitches in his system that Connor marvels at sometimes. He feels so strongly it affects the very core of his being.
If he looks at the tasklist still present there, the top item on it is just one word, with a series of collapsed subtasks: HANK
Connor's not sure how other androids experience love, or any other emotion. But his very nature means he understands very well what they mean for him.
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That's what breaks it. That he tears himself away from the wash of wonderful emotion and saves Connor a look at his subtask folder because he fuckin' forgot to do up a shirt button. But he actually looks a little sheepish as he does it.
"That's uh... that's a lot. So you can do that whenever you want?"
He rubs the back of his neck, ducking his head so his hair hangs in his face and he collects himself. Having someone say they care is one thing. Have it hit him so fully and forcefully is another.
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"Sorry if that was too much," he says, making himself smile comfortingly as he forces back his own feeling that he overstepped a boundary of some kind. "I didn't think it was... It was a lot."
He hadn't stopped to consider what Hank would see about how Connor saw Hank himself.
"I don't have to do it again, I just wanted to know if it was possible. My processors speed up so much that a human couldn't usually keep up. But you can." He leans forward, putting a hand on Hank's knee and trying to look at his face. "That's all I was trying to show you."
no subject
He gives Connor an appreciative look. "It's amazing. It's more than any mod would be able to see, and I don't know. I've never had anyone look at me like that?"
In so much detail. Appreciating parts of him he'd never looked at. Prioritized his happiness with his own thorough folder.